Today’s assignment: write about finding something, about lost and found, connecting it to day four as this is the third part of that series.
Last Sunday was just another Sunday, the usual things took place, fighting to get my ass out of bed so early in the morning, getting to church making sure all the teachers were there, that the nursery staff was there and had what they needed, finding students I needed to check in with, the usual.
I joined the adult ed class about half way through to listen to the discussion as several weeks ago all the confirmation students who handed in sermon notes on that Sunday’s sermon had the same question, “why is it better to die”? Needless to say this sort of freaked me out so I asked the Pastor what he had preached, as I was in Minnesota with Francene that Sunday. After reading his sermon and looking at the text, Mark 8:31-38, which talks about loosing ones life I thought it would be a good idea for the Pastor to talk with the students.
By the end of the discussion it seemed like they understood that “loosing one’s life” was not about dying and definitely not about taking your own life but about not being so caught up in yourself, your own life, that you forget to love God and love your neighbor.
Death, dying and loss have been so prevalent in my world lately I can’t seem to shake it off. Anyhow I went back to my office to meet with some folks about a new project I had asked them to take on which involves some video taping. I found the camera but couldn’t find the cord.
While searching through my desk I opened a drawer moved some papers around and found a card, a card from Francene. It was like time stood still. It was like tunnel vision or an out of body experience. I could see my hand reaching for the card, I picked it up and a picture of Cassie fluttered to the floor. I briefly opened the card saw her hand writing, dropped it back in the drawer and slammed it shut.
I had found something that I didn’t even know was lost. But it was too soon. The pain is still too raw. In time I know that I will cherish that card, it was the last she had sent me, it means so much to me but right now looking at it, holding it shattered my heart.
For now the card is tucked safely in my drawer, lost no more. Sometimes I just place my hand on the outside of the drawer and I can feel her presences, forever in my heart, my dearest friend I miss you so.
Till next time craft on!